2019 journal entry

“It seems that as we get older, that fact of not knowing what the future holds, instead of being full of intrigue, is an invitation to worry. In one’s mid fifties, ‘not knowing what is going to happen’ invites the thought, ‘One of us could have cancer or a heart attack any day.’ At 29, it was more like, ‘How much sex will we have,’ ‘Will we plan a vacation or have a heart-to-heart talk,’ ‘Will I meet a cute guy at this party,’ ‘Will I like this job.'”

Anxiety and Appreciation

I probably hadn’t gone 47 straight days of eating exclusively at home since I was in high school 40 years ago. 

Bam! Dining out is prohibited.

When my husband brought home takeout barbecue last week — thank goodness restaurants can open for takeout — it was such a treat that I felt I should dress up for date night. I was already wearing my “better” sweatpants, so I didn’t bother. The next day, we were still crowing about our special meal: “Wasn’t that so much fun?” If you’d told me three months ago that I’d stop going to restaurants, I would have reacted with astonishment and, probably, petulance. 

Bike ride with mask

During the past week, the grassroots and then the CDC decided everybody should wear a mask when they go out. This caught on like wildfire! I had to go downtown briefly today and wanted to ride my bike. I almost decided to drive, because I didn’t want to be someone who flies by people less than six feet from them as if assuming one can’t be contagious when going fast.